Friday, July 13, 2007

I Hate It!!!!

It’s been really long since I wrote. A month and a half to be precise. As the old cliché goes I seem to be suffering from a writers block. The main reason for this block is the fact that I have absolutely no free time on my hands now and I hate it. There was a time when I was averaging 7-8 posts per month and now I am finding it difficult to write a post a month. It’s amazing actually. when I was absolutely jobless and there was nothing happening in my life I had so much to write and so much to look forward to and now when there is so much happening in my life my mind refuses to give my hands the ability to pen down my thoughts. I wish my mind were a free bird again so that it could wander here and there looking at life from the eyes of a person who had nothing better to do than eat and sleep and write. I find it irritating finding no time on my hands and even if I do find time I am thinking about trivial and mundane things like house rent, cell phone bill, water, food, electricity, java tests (ewwww) and so many other things which I had absolutely NO interest in about a month back and its really hard to write when your mind is bogged down by such things. If it had been the "jobless" me I would have found something interesting to write about how we searched for our house (the difficulties encountered) how I struggled to pay my bills, what I did with my first salary and so much. But right now have lost the ability to laugh at life, its idiosyncracies, its beauty, it charm, it cruelty etc. I am leading this extremely monotonous and miserable existence where the only things that change daily are the clothes I wear. I think dinesh put it beautifully when he wrote this post. I am pretty much going through the same now and I absolutely hate it. I want no stress on my pea size brain, I want me to be absolutely free with lots of time to think about what to write, I want to regain my ability to laugh at myself and my surroundings and most of all I want to write but cant.. :(