Hmmmmm!!!

It is a Friday and I feel none of the excitement associated with a Friday because I am working tomorrow. I had this wild fantastic idea today morning that maybe just maybe everyone at work will forget that tomorrow is working and not turn up thinking it is a usual Saturday. Lame I know but then when u are as desperate as me for a weekend u begin to hallucinate and think that anything is possible. And today morning as soon as I checked my office mail the first mail to meet my eye was this mail from Operations HR “just a gentle reminder to tell u that tomorrow is a working day as usual and we are compensating for the holiday announced on Monday because of the state wide bandh”. So much for everyone forgetting that Saturday would be working. Never before have I pressed the shift + delete keys with more vengeance to delete a particular mail. :-.

And after u have had an absolutely fantabulous four day weekend (God bless mahatma Gandhi for being born on October 2. October 1 was a state wide bandh so ultimately it became a four day weekend) doing nothing but eating, sleeping and making merry with your friends, you hate coming to office so much that the hatred which osama bin laden feels for Bush would seem trivial compared to it. The best day was Monday. I love going around with my friends and roaming around the city but I love idling away time reading a book and listening to music a little more than that. Monday I was on house arrest because of the bandh and I spent it reading a PG Wodehouse, listening to songs by KK and eating vengaya sambhar and vendekka curry made by paati. I have decided that IF IF IF IF IF ever I marry I will only marry someone who can write like PGW, sing like KK and cook like my grandmother. That’s not much to ask for. And oh yeah!! If he happens to look like George Clooney I wouldn’t mind that!! ;)

I just realized that I have been meting out step-motherly treatment to my blog. After I started blogging on Cognizant internal blogs I have almost stopped blogging on my external blog. I feel really bad coz this blog has been with me for almost two years now and has seen me through sooooooooooo many things. My emotions are best expressed when I write about them and this blog of mine has been proof of that fact. So no matter how popular I get on the internal blog revsrules will always be my first love (internal blog would be my second love, and third would be the guy who can write like PGW, sing like KK, cook like my grandmother and looks like George Clooney(this one’soptional)..;) ). Well anyway so I am going to increase my blogging activity on my external blog and try to blog almost daily about my un-eventful life. Maybe writing about it will make it more eventful. Maybe. Un-eventful life reminds me, I better get back to work!! ;)

Re"Vetti" - R.I.P (Even my jokes are as sad as my Life is :-\)

I hereby announce the death of my alter ego a.k.a Re"vetti". I was re-christened Re"vetti" by a friend of mine (I forget who. I think it was Rahul. I am not sure though and I definitely don’t want to give HIM credit for re-christening me!! :P) around three years back in my second year of engineering when the maximum work I did was eating and sleeping(yeah sometimes when I was awake and not hungry I also visited college once in a while). I was utterly jobless then and hence the name Re"Vetti" came to be. it became hugely popular and almost everyone I knew (even those I didn’t know) then started calling me by this name.(I didn’t mind. as long as I wasn’t called fatty or shorty or something I was happy.)

Anyway coming back to the point I hereby announce the death of my alter ego Re"Vetti" because after she stayed in office till ten for the past two weeks(it promises to get worse by the way) and worked on Saturdays she no longer deserves to be called thus!! I can’t believe (and most of the people around me can’t believe) the fact that I am actually doing some work. in the past 21 years of my existence I have never done anything which can even remotely be classified as work (no wait!! I really really worked for my sisters wedding. I tasted all the food in the sathram and informed my parents if the menu and taste were fine. yup!! now that’s work.***) and now I am working so much that I have no time left to do anything else nowadays. I get up at 7.00 leave for office at 8.30 come back home and 10.30 and hit the bed. (wow!! what an absolutely happening life I must say). one day I had so much of work that I had to actually catch the cab at 11.45 in the night and by the time I came home it was 12.30. Sheesh!! I can’t believe its me. I used to look down upon people who worked beyond 6.00 in the evening and now I have become a person whom I would have scorned a few months back!! :(

I think god has this quota that every human being should do so much of work and since I haven’t done any of it in the past 21 years he is making me work my posterior out now (oh yeah!! I am a thorough professional now. I don’t use terms like A** and all that now. sigh!! how much a job in a software company can change a person!!)

So it’s official. all u people who derived pleasure out of calling me Re'Vetti' kindly desist from using the word vetti in my context. I no longer deserve it. people who sympathize with me after reading this blog and are going "Awwww. poor girl" u guys are the best and I hope god blesses you with as little work (and as high a salary of course) as possible. and for people who are smirking and going "Hah!! she calls 12.30 late?? I stay in office till 2.00- 3.00 and am back in office at 9.00 next day morning" u seriously need help. there is lots and lots to life apart from work and if u r missing out on all that its time u went to psychiatrist and got ur head checked. Sorry if I sound rude but frankly I doubt it if anyone belonging to the latter category would actually visit my blog.

By the way my blog is right now suffering from abject lack of visitors with visitors fewer than Pamela Anderson’s clothes in Baywatch (and that is saying something). Now I am not a person who cares about numbers. I don’t care if I have any visitors or not. I write because I love to write and right now it is the only source of entertainment in my otherwise bland and bleak existence. It was just something that I noticed. U stop updating Ur blog and the visitors to Ur blog also stop.

I am sure at least 99% of u r wondering what the hell is she trying to say. Honestly even I don’t know. So I will just stop rambling now and let u derive ur own conclusions from this post of mine. I will just get back to work. C ya.

P.S: initially I thought I wouldn’t post this blog at all because it was so full of shit but then it took me ten minutes to type all this nonsense up and I am not letting all that effort go waste!! so people who are still reading and have actually read this far I bow down. if I had been in ur place I would have just clicked that small red color cross on the right corner of my window right after the first para!! :P

***- This is what i meant when i said my jokes are as sad as my life is!! My sense of humor seems to have gone for a toss!! :(

Hair (S)care!!

I remember about five or six years back there was this advertisement of some hair oil (the name of the product eludes me) whose tagline was Careless a irundha thalai hairless aaidum (If u are careless you will become hairless) and my sister and I used to go into peals of laughter hearing it and throw knowing glances at my dad who in spite of not being careless was hairless!! ;)

A couple of days back my worst nightmare turned into a reality when I saw half my hair on my pillow half of it on the comb I use and remaining in the sink in the bathroom after I had had a head bath. I was as shocked as mallika sherawat would be if she were asked to wear some clothes, as shocked as bal thackerey would be if he were asked to be the editor of playboy (trivia: who is the editor of playboy??).

Anyway you get the drift as to how shocked I was don’t u?

When u r 21 you are young, enthusiastic with a zeal for life and a hairless head is not something u would like to have. Obviously I was extremely worried about this and asked the various members of my family what must be done.

In the order of seniority I shall describe the reactions of my family members at this sudden mane-loss I was suffering!! I asked my grandmother who I assumed would have one of those grandma things to give me which would make my hair grow overnight.

Now for my grandmother the only solution to all the ailments in this world is one single thing - Curd Rice or thayir sadam. She believes that almost any disease, infection, mental agony etc can be solved/cured just by having thayir sadam!! Her standard reply for everything is “Thayir sadam sapadu. Yellam seriya podium!! (Eat curd rice and all will be well)”
This is the conversation which generally goes on at our place

My Aunt: its the year end and I have so much work in office. I feel so tired when I get back home

Grandma: eat curd rice. It will give u energy

My cousin: Damn!! I have got my physics exam tomorrow and I cant remember any of these stupid formulae

Grandma: eat curd rice. It will sharpen ur memory

My 7 year old cousin: Paati my leg is itching from the morning.

grandma: must be some kind of skin rash. Eat curd rice. it will be ok by tomorrow

no prizes for guessing what her reply was when I asked her the remedy for my incessant hairfall..Curd Rice of course
My grandmothers idea of paradise would be one huge hall filled with people with all kinds of problems, a cow which would continuously give her good milk (to make curd of course) and a huge cooker where she would prepare rice and distribute curd rice to everyone!!
needless to say after eating all that curd rice, grow I did but not in the head region. I grew immensely along the x axis. and in a way my grand mom was right. curd rice did solve my problem. after eating curd rice I put on so much of weight that my hair fall problem seemed trivial!! :

Next was my dad. now for u guys who have seen my dad quit laughing. I know asking my dad tips on how to control hair fall would be as absurd as asking Sonia Gandhi to take Hindi classes or asking Vijay Mallya to hold discourse on simple living. But anyway I did ask him. Now my dad is exactly the kind of dad a lazy, lethargic girl wouldn’t want. He goes jogging at 5 in the morning then comes home and does yoga and even before I get up he is off to work. And he never misses an opportunity to advise me on my “early-rising” habit.

Me: appa my hair fall has increased exponentially and I am really worried. What should I do?

Appa: Exercise!!

Me: eh???

Appa: you just don’t get enough exercise. If u exercise u will have a healthy body which in turn will lead to a healthy mind and ur hair will grow

(No!! being the good daughter that I am I did not ask my dad if he was an exception to that rule!!)
My fathers idea of paradise would be our entire family dressed in reebok shoes, tracks and jogging 5 kms every morning at 5.00 am.

Following my dad’s advice made me lose all the weight that curd rice had genially helped me put on but it did nothing to control my hair fall!!

Next was my mother. I knew what my mother’s solution would be but me being me
I just couldn’t resist asking her

Me: amma I have been having this problem of hair fall for the past two weeks. What should I do to control it?
Amma: what’s ur hemoglobin

Me: (thinks) now my hemoglobin aint George Clooney’s birth date that I will remember it by heart.
Me: errrr..ummm..9

Amma: See!! No wonder. You never eat green vegetables or fruits. How many times I have told u not to eat junk. Eat pomegranates or apples when u r hungry not chips and all that other nonsense u eat!!

Now in vegetables green is the only color I dislike. I cant stand green leafy vegetables, I cant stand bottle gourd, bitter gourd, snake gourd, all the other gourds, palak, methi, mooli, cabbage. Basically I have an allergy towards healthy things.

My mom’s idea of paradise would be a huge table filled with never-ending cabbage, palak, broccoli (this blasted vegetable wasn’t even available in India a few years back but ever since my mom realized that it is rich in vitamin A and C, is anti-cancer, anti- cholesterol, anti-fat and anti-children she always makes it a point to stuff me with it) and my dad, sister and I grazing errr i mean eating while my mother looks on.

Amma: hair fall is mainly because of lack of vitamin A. now if only u would drink the broccoli and palak soup I made u wouldn’t complain so much!! Hmph!! :?

Me: broccoli and palak soup??? Ewwwwwwwwww…

Needless to say my mother wasn’t pleased and she refused to give me any more tips on how to control my mane-loss (and in a way I was relieved)

Next was my sister.

Me: hey preethi!! Listen..i have been having this problem of hair fall man. I am really worried. What do I do?

Preethi: Shehnaz Hussain!!

Me: huh??

Preethi: try this hair cream by shehnaz hussain. Its absolutely great

Now if u have seen shehnaz hussain u will know why I was very sure that I did not want to use any hair cream made by her!! ;) for the benefit of those who haven’t seen her here is a picture.

(Don’t ask me who the dude with her his. This was the first image of hers which was thrown up when I said shahnaz hussain on Google images!! )
Anyway coming to the point Yeah I want my hair to grow but not to such an extent that u cannot distinguish between a bear and me.

For my sister whatever shahnaz hussain says is gospel truth. As for me I wasn’t very convinced and hence refrained from using the hair cream suggested by my sister!!


Ultimately suggestions from my entire family failed to help me and even as I write this post my hair fall is probably in progress and I already have these bald patches around my head and I really don’t appreciate it when people look at my dad then look at me and say with a smirk “Must be hereditary ”

So there ends this sad story of how a girl born into a weird family, suffered from hair loss, had no one to help her ultimately died bald!!:(

Yeah I know u guys are choked and are probably bawling now so for every person who sympathizes with me I shall give a free box of tissues!!

My Cooking (S)Kills

Couple of days back i decided to surprise my sister by cooking dinner for her before she came back from office. knowing that my minimal culinary skills(read zero culinary skills) did not permit me to make aloo ka paratha, malai kofta,shahi paneer etc i decided on simple roti, dal and chawal.. i learnt a lot of lessons that day
now i have no clue how to cook dal so i went to food world called my mom and asked her what were the ingredients required to make dal

mom: toor dal can be used to make dal but there....
me: yeah ok ma.talk to u later.bye

Lesson 1: when ur mom says "but" dont cut the call. listen to what she has to say.

not heeding my mother's "but" i went around to the dal section of the shop and was met by a 6ft x 5ft shelf full of dals of different sizes shapes and colours

me:(asking the help there): errr..toor dal..which one is it
help: which one do u want. do u want full toor, half broken, broken, premium quality, normal quality
me: wait!! stop. err gimme the one they use to make sambhar

Lesson 2: Just because both sambhar and dal are different shades of yellow DOES NOT mean they are made using the same dal

the help gives me a dal which i proudly buy. i also buy some tomatoes, onions and chillies and head back home to prepare dal a la yummy!! (thats the name i proposed to give my dal. only it was all but yummy)

i go home take a cooker measure some dal wash it thoroughly put the dal into the cooker put lots of water and put it on the gas and wait for the whistle.

next i cut all the vegetables put it on a kadai and saunter the vegetables. i do this realy well

Lesson 3: sauntering vegetables is the easiest thing to do and even a baby can do it and only an extremley culinary un-skilled person can spoil this

next i try to make the dough for the rotis. i learnt a lot of lessons while doing this task.

Lesson 4: never make the dough for the rotis without supervision when u r doing it the first time. you will i repeat WILL spoil it.

Lesson 5: if u are forced to do it alone then for pete's sake take a small quantity to experiment and then if u are successfull make more atta

i took about 5 table spoons of atta (pilsbury) put it on a plate, poured a tumbler of water and started making the dough

Lesson 6: while making atta DO NOT add all the water all at once. add water little by little and make the dough

i started making the dough but it was a gooey messy affair and there was entirely too much water so i put in two more table spoons of atta, and then there was too much atta so i put in some more water. this went on until i was left with one huge blob of &*#%^(i dunno what to call it. even i wouldnt go as far as calling it atta). i tried to check the porosity (hardness) of the atta by poking it with my finger. my finger refused to penetrate the dough. Next I tested it using a pencil. The pencil broke (Come on people!! Graphite is after all the softest non-metal. Its not like my pencil was made of diamond or something). Well anyway the bottom line is that euphemistically put the dough was not appropriate for human consumption
at this point I suddenly remembered my dal. All this while I didn’t hear a single whistle and hence assumed that the dal was happily cooking inside the cooker.

Lesson 7: If after 20 minutes of cooking something in the cooker (esp dal) if u don’t hear a whistle it is NOT a positive sign.

I just left the dal in the cooker and was wondering what I would do with the hard, rigid, tough, inflexible and inedible blob of &*#%^ when I smelt something burning faintly. I rushed to the cooker switched off the gas and opened my cooker to find a 3 inch layer of black soot and four (yes guys!! Exactly four pieces of that blasted yellow colour dal that I bought) sitting prettily on top of the bed of black soot. If not for my distraught state I would have taken a couple of pictures and put it up but unfortunately I didn’t take any pictures.

Then I tried to clean the cooker. I tried and tried and tried cursing all those people in the Vim and Pril ad’s who make washing dirt and grime on vessels seem like so easy and effortless (agreed the “grime” in my case was a little too much but still)

Lesson 8: if u burn something do NOT try to wash the burnt vessel at once. Let it lie in water for some time. The water helps loosen up all the dirt and washing is easier

Anyway after this disastrous attempt at cooking I tried to clean up all the mess I had created. (there was white colored flour everywhere aesthetically decorated by black soot at places, sauntered vegetables on a kadai gone cold now etc) but before I could begin the bell rang and in came my sister.
Shock, wise people have said is also a form of surprise (so I actually did manage to surprise my sister!! Yay!!!)

Now my sister is a cleanliness freak. She just CANNOT stand dirty things. Her wardrobe is perfectly clean, her house is always disinfected and its floors can be used for the “after” scenes in the domex and lizol ad’s , her kitchen is always clean and there isn’t a single vessel or towel or plate which is ever out of place. And when she saw the state of the kitchen, the dough, the black soot and the non-existent dal she flipped!!

Lesson 9: when u have a sister who is a cleanliness freak don’t even attempt to give her surprises. It really doesn’t work. Trust me

I got a longggg lecture from her explaining to me the difference between the dal used for making sambhar and the dal used for making normal dal (frankly speaking i still do not know the difference. they are both yellow and they are both round). apparently the dal which i had used requires more water and hence the silly dal had burnt and not cooked!! when I tried telling her that I was just trying to surprise her I got another long lecture on the ill effects of surprising people.

Lesson 10: (the golden one): When u are in deep shit DO NOT open ur mouth!! ;)

After my futile attempt to surprise my sister with my culinary and not achieving the desired effect I have never attempted to cook again both for my sake and for the general good of the world!!

For all those people who are wondering where my previous post is, I had to remove my previous post due to some constraints!!!
so kindly wait till my block clears and i am able to write again..will try to blog more often now that training is over!! :)
And i just now noticed(thanks to BOB) that i have crossed a 10000 hits
thanks all for taking some time off and reading my verbose ramblings..feels great to cross 10000 hits!!
keep visiting!! :)

I Hate It!!!!

It’s been really long since I wrote. A month and a half to be precise. As the old cliché goes I seem to be suffering from a writers block. The main reason for this block is the fact that I have absolutely no free time on my hands now and I hate it. There was a time when I was averaging 7-8 posts per month and now I am finding it difficult to write a post a month. It’s amazing actually. when I was absolutely jobless and there was nothing happening in my life I had so much to write and so much to look forward to and now when there is so much happening in my life my mind refuses to give my hands the ability to pen down my thoughts. I wish my mind were a free bird again so that it could wander here and there looking at life from the eyes of a person who had nothing better to do than eat and sleep and write. I find it irritating finding no time on my hands and even if I do find time I am thinking about trivial and mundane things like house rent, cell phone bill, water, food, electricity, java tests (ewwww) and so many other things which I had absolutely NO interest in about a month back and its really hard to write when your mind is bogged down by such things. If it had been the "jobless" me I would have found something interesting to write about how we searched for our house (the difficulties encountered) how I struggled to pay my bills, what I did with my first salary and so much. But right now have lost the ability to laugh at life, its idiosyncracies, its beauty, it charm, it cruelty etc. I am leading this extremely monotonous and miserable existence where the only things that change daily are the clothes I wear. I think dinesh put it beautifully when he wrote this post. I am pretty much going through the same now and I absolutely hate it. I want no stress on my pea size brain, I want me to be absolutely free with lots of time to think about what to write, I want to regain my ability to laugh at myself and my surroundings and most of all I want to write but cant.. :(

Finally i am back to chennai and back to where i belong. and yeah thankfully my trip back to chennai wasnt as eventful as my trip home. i just had to wait for 7 hours in the ahemdabad airport doing absolutely nothing. my bus from jamanagr to ahemdabad arrived at 7.00 in the morning and my flight from ahemdabad to chennai was at 3.00 in the afternoon. oh man!!! i experienced absolute heights of boredom. i did not have my laptop, i did not anyone for company and i knew absolutely no one in ahemdabad whose house i could go to and the worst part was that i could not walk up and down exploring the airport for fear of the fact that someone might pilfer my luggage. as my luck would have it my mom sent all important things with me to give to people all over chennai. the number of instruction i got!!!oh man!! "mythili aunty's sari is in this one. its very important. dont lose it". "preethi's diamond earrings are in that one. guard it very carefully dont check in that bag. have it as your hand luggage and this is a gas regulator which your fathers colleagues neigbours wifes sister will come and collect from you once u reach chennai. be very careful with their stuff. mothers i tell you!!!

so i just sat like piece of luggage in the airport, obvioulsy inviting curious glances and stares from the airport workers who were probably thinking that i am a terrorist checking out the aiport to bomb it or something. maybe the airhostesses felt that i had come to take their place. heh heh!!ok ok..no tension. and anyway those air hostesses look so bad. i mean yeah ok u need to put make up to look presentable but cant u put it in such a way that makes u look presentable and also a little human?? they have layers and layers of stuff on their cheeks, their eyes and lips and an extremely artificial and plastic smile on their faces. ewwwwwwww. well somehow i managed to kill time. thankfully i had a book with me. god bless PG Wodehouse. thanks to PGW i was laughing to myself all the time thus inviting even more glances from everyone around me. :D:D. and the worst part was that the ahemdabad airport was being renovated or soenthing there was just one shop in the whole airport which sold something to eat. i had one sandwich for 60 bucks and i dunno what filled my stomach. the sandwich or the steep prices!!!

well finally 2 o clock came, i checked in my luggage, discovered that it was 2 kilos overweight because of all the stuff my mom had packed, paid excess baggage charges and finally boarded the flight thinking that i would be in chennai in another 2 hrs. only then i came to know that the flight had a stop in hyderabad and only then it would go to chennai. had to wait in the plane at hyd airport for about an hour and then finally after four hours i reached chennai at 6.30. phew!! did i say it wasnt an eventful trip??;)

Its Funny

Though it might sound very funny I am finding it very difficult to adjust to my life at home. Home is the place where one is most comfortable and finds all the pleasures of the world and still I feel so out of place. Each morning when I get up it feels funny to get up to the smell of clean sheets and burning incense and an empty other half of the bed after being used to getting up to the smell of unwashed dirty linen and the presence of my huge roommate on the other half of the bed. In my sleepy state I shuffle for my cell and my bathroom slippers only to realize that I am home and have no use for these things. While going to brush my teeth I brace myself for the toothpaste hunt and then realize that a new fat tube of toothpaste is staring at me from the shelf. Its funny. After being so used to the ways of the hostel I am finding it difficult to adjust at home. Its funny when my dad comes and wakes me up at 5.00 and says “you never get any exercise. Lets go jogging” and I feel like telling him “Dude!!! Get a life and a watch. Do u have any idea what the time is. How can u go around waking up people in the middle of the night like a banshee”. But of course he being my father I refrain from saying those words. Its funny when my mom tells me “you are 21. you have attained marriageable age. U better learn to cook”. The woman who has never let me enter her kitchen for fear of me converting it into a disaster zone is now giving me responsibilities and asking me to cook, clean, water the plants (it’s a different issue that I never do any of that). Its funny when I realize that I can eat how many ever papad’s I want to without the mess workers telling me that I am allowed only one(papad’s are the only edible things in our mess). It feels funny to enjoy all the food that’s on the table and have mom cook what u like. It feels funny to have the computer all to yourself without having to share it with twenty different people on the floor. It feels funny when I try searching for a bucket while going to take bath and then realize that this is home and bucket, soap and all the luxuries are available is in the bathroom itself. Its funny when I hear a particular song and excitedly look around to tell someone “machi!!thats our song they are playing” and realize I am sitting in a empty room whose silence is deafening after being used to the constant din at hostel. Its funny when mom comes at 10 in the night and tells me “still awake??? Its so late. U better go to bed” and I feel like telling her that this is the time we usually get up after our afternoon nap in the hostel and start having fun. My life at home feels very very funny but when I go to sleep at night and silent tears fall down my cheek and I wish I were back on my smelly sheets in hostel, back to the disgusting mess food and back with all my friends, that is when it stops being funny.

P.S: this I think is my third nostalgic post about college and hostel life but I cant help it. I miss that life so much!!!!:( :(

Jinxed!!!

After the happenings in my life in the last one day I have come to the conclusion that I must have been very very busy collecting bad luck and jinxes when god was distributing good luck and charm. Before yesterday I used to find Murphy’s laws funny and laugh at them but considering all that has happened yesterday if Murphy were alive today I would have given him a slow painful and horrific death.

Before u guys decide to call Kilpauk and institutionalize me let me recount the happenings of 17-18th May. For the first time in my life my parents had booked me on a flight from Chennai to Bombay and another one from Bombay to Jamnagar (usually I go in flight from Chennai to Bombay and then from there till Jamnagar in train). I was thrilled and overjoyed at the thought of traveling in comfort all the way from Chennai to Jamnagar, something which I had never done. Jamnagar being an extremely remote underdeveloped and disgusting city is situated in the western tip of Gujarat (don’t sweat if u have no clue where Jamnagar is. When my parents first told me that we were shifting to Jamnagar in class 7th I thought it was some foreign country) and is the worst connected place. There are no direct trains from Chennai, there is only a single flight from Bombay and the trip from Chennai to Jamnagar is an adventure in itself. An auto from home to Chennai airport, flight from Chennai to Bombay, train from Bombay to Jamnagar and another two hours of car journey on disgusting roads to home. By the time I reach home the excitement of coming home would die down and the fact that I would have to undergo similar torture a month from now to come back to Chennai would totally put me off.


This time I was beyond myself with joy that the torture trip would be a lot less tortuous because I was going all the way by flight. My happiness was very very short lived to say the least. I caught the flight from Chennai to Bombay and landed in Bombay at 11. my flight to Jamnagar was at 12 and I so I had to rush to another terminal to check in my luggage and get my boarding pass. The two terminals are separated by a distance of half a km and I ran like a woman possessed to reach the correct terminal at time(all this while my cell was ringing away but because I was running like my pants were on fire I couldn’t talk). I reached just in time puffed and panted and checked in my luggage and went to the counter to collect my boarding pass. This was the conversation between the guy at the counter and me

Me(puffing and panting and heaving): Jamnagar.. Bombay Jamnagar please.

Guy: sorry ma’am??

Me: boarding pass for the flight to Jamnagar please

Guy: Oh!! Sorry ma’am that flight got cancelled in the morning. Dint u get a message from us??

Me: what????????????? What the#@%#$%R%*&

Guy: yes we sent a message to everyone in the morning at 9.00 ma’am.

Me: but I was in the flight from Chennai to Bombay then and my cell was switched off (I have no clue why I said this. It made absolutely no difference to him if I had come from Chennai or Chicago or Czechoslovakia and he was about as interested in my case as I am during a class of software testing)

Guy: I am sorry ma’am. U can go to the ticketing counter and get a full refund on the ticket or reschedule for the same flight tomorrow. Sorry for the inconvenience.

Me :( thinks) U As******. Don’t say sorry for the inconvenience when u don’t mean it.
Me: (says) ok

Now I had no clue what to do who to call. That’s when I realize that I better call my parents and tell them that they can enjoy one more day of peace without me when they call me and tell me that my flight has been cancelled and that I need to contact my cousin in Bombay who would come and pick me up. Now for people who know me u know that I never have balance in my cell to even message let alone call. So I went to the nearest STD booth called my cousin fixed up things and went to the ticketing counter to re schedule my tickets. When she asked me for a photo identity I rummaged in my bag for my purse to get my license when I realized that my purse was missing. With all my luggage I ran like a crazy idiot to the STD booth when I heard the loudspeakers in the airport blare “We request Miss. Revathi Ramanan to kindly get in touch with the airport manager as soon as possible”. I rushed to the manager’s office and had to listen to a fifteen minute lecture from him about carelessness (I hope my parents never stumble across this blog. I still haven’t told them that I came very close to losing my purse with 1000 odd bucks, my license, ATM card and my identity card and if they come to know about it they will never let me live it down) and then for another fifteen minutes he made me describe the contents of the purse in detail. (it was silly because my photo is there on my license and on my ID card and he just had to look at my face to know that it was my purse he was holding in his crummy hands). Anyway I had to again rush to the original terminal where I had gotten off because the driver was waiting there. He took me to my cousin’s place. I was kind of happy because I have two angelic nieces and an awesome sister in law and I was really looking forward to seeing them. But as luck would have it they had all left for delhi for the summer and my cousin was leaving that night.

So I was stuck in a house with a laptop for company and no books to read. Absolute heights of boredom. Somehow I killed time spent the night in an empty house and got up in the morning to a message from the friggin airlines (air deccan) telling me that my flight had been delayed by an hour and that they were “sorry for the inconvenience”. So I spent another three hours at my cousins place and finally reached the airport confirmed if the flight was on today and sent the driver away, checked in my luggage, got my boarding pass and waited for 1.00 to come. Till 12.40 when they hadn’t called for boarding I went to the counter and asked them and the lady at the counter very coolly tells me “the Bombay Jamnagar flight has been further delayed by an hour ma’am. We will be leaving at 2.00 and boarding at 1.40. sorry for the inconvenience ma’am”. I still dunno how I controlled myself from hitting her and boxing her ears. In an extremely sarcastic tone (which was wasted on her) I asked “will it atleast leave at 2 or will it be further delayed?”. “no ma’am we will be leaving at 2.00 sharp’

That done I sat and waited for another hour at the airport counting the number of lights the number of vents in the AC and trying to solve the sudoku, kakuro, crossword etc in the paper. Finally at 2.10 I boarded the rickety flight(I am not exaggerating but I swear I have seen PTC buses in Chennai which are more hi tech than air deccan’s flights. No AC, dirty seats, sleepy sir hostesses and a captain whose English was pathetic). And then the runway wasn’t free so we had to wait for another 45 minutes and finally the flight took off at 3.00 and I reached Jamnagar at 4.30 pm.

After I had reached Jamnagar for some time I dint believe it. I saw my sister and mom at the airport and rubbed my eyes to affirm the fact that yes, after much ado I had finally reached the godforsaken Jamnagar. I just cant wait for CTS to call so I can leave this hell and go back to my paradise a.k.a Chennai!! :)

Operation Sunrise :)

Though today can go down in history as one of the most depressing days in my life I am quite happy that finally after the end of four years I have been successful in completing operation sunrise. Before u guys decide that I belong to some terrorist group which goes around murdering people before sunrise let me tell you what operation sunrise is. Operation sunrise in ladies hostel of SSN means that we stay awake till the sun rises and after dawn breaks we hit our beds..:P:P..i have been unsuccessfully trying to complete operation sunrise for the past four years but I always doze off by four. But yesterday I sat up till six and watched the sun rise over the horizon and for the first time in my felt that I could have been a morning person. The dawn looked beautiful, the weather perfect, the breeze just right and the company just awesome!!(thanks Mi:)). I am sure I will be overwhelmed with emotions if I start writing about operation sunrise in detail. So I will just tell u in short about yesterday night (my last and most perfect night in hostel)

Toshibha laptop with 80 Gb harddisk : Rs 35000

Thiruttu DVD of Chennai 28 : Rs 40

Packet of Murukku and two diary milk bars : Rs 50

Sitting under a tree at 3.00 in the morning watching the song jalsa pannunga da..from Chennai 28 with some of my bestest friends in the cool summer night breeze and wishing the night would never end : Priceless :) :)..

I dedicate this post to all my friends in general and to Milinta, Aki, Fermie, Madhu and Gowri in particular who made my last night in the hostel all the more special by staying up all night with me. Love u guys a lot.

Today is my last day in the hostel and I have met some amazing people and made some really great friends. I sincerely hope we remain in touch years after we part!!

P.S: a special mention about preethi who came in at 3.00 and provided us with diary milk (she specifically wanted me to mention this..happy now preethi?? :D:D)

P.P.S: Another special mention about Thiru who tried to stay up with me but dozed off in between. Love ya loads

P.P.S: No more special mentions girls. I Love all u guys. :):)

Travails of Travel

Having lived in Chennai for the past six years and having traveled in the bus for majority of those six years I think I am qualified enough to write about bus travel in the (in)famous PTC buses of Chennai. This blog comes in wake of a recent event in my life. My bus travel from adyar to velacherry.
Now coming to bus travel. There are five stages in bus travel namely

Sitting
Standing
Squeezing
Dying
Dead

Let me discuss each of these stages in detail. My experience with the first and second category is almost nil coz I have NEVER got the place to sit, sometimes if I am lucky I get an area of quarter feet by quarter feet to stand but MOST of the times I come under category three or four.

SITTING:
If u have done punyam in ur previous janma or if u r as belligerent as mike Tyson or if u board a bus at the source station u will be lucky enough to belong to this category. When u belong to this category u can sit comfortably in the seats and smirk at all the standing/squeezing/dying/dead people around u as if to say “Ho ho ho!!i sit therefore I am”(ok that was a bad one!!sorry). most of the times even if u board the bus at the source station u might have to go to the standing category because u have been pushed roughly or elbowed cruelly by some meenkaari/ pookaari/pichakaari/karigakaari who believes herself to be mike Tyson re-incarnate!! A disadvantage of being in this category is that if u r below the age of 30(and are sitting) then u will have to give up ur seat for old women/expectant mothers/ women with small wailing running nose kids. This way u can do some punyam and ensure urself a seat in the bus in ur next janma.

STANDING:
This is a comparatively comfortable position where u will have some space to stand (sometimes even lean) comfortably and have no fear of perverts (because u can steer clear of them. U will have ample space to do so) or pickpockets. U will have enough space to walk to the conductor and buy ur own ticket and will be able to get down comfortable when ur stop arrives without having to push/pull/shove/ jostle through a sea of humanity. And after u get down u wont feel like someone has just squeezed the life out of u and u will be still be able to walk.

SQUEEZING:

This is the next stage where the rule of 40 sitting+25 standing will be broken. There will be 40 people sitting and around 40-50 people hanging, standing, suspended, stamping and doing lots of other disgusting things. In this stage it is best to carry with u a deodorant with you. This is not for you. This can come in handy when u r forced to stand next to person who has lifted his hands to suport himself and the stench emanating from his underarms is suffocating u to say the least. So a minimum requirement for this stage is to carry a deo if u want to survive and not die of asphyxiation. U can liberally spray the person with the deo. In this stage u must try to reach the entrance two stops before u wanna get down. Only then u might be successful in getting down two stops after ur intended stop. In this stage u can vent out all ur anger on someone by going personally to buy tickets(rather than passing it thru someone) and stamping the feet of everyone really hard with all ur strength in the process. Really helps ease out the tension of being squeezed mercilessly like a lemon inside a lemon squeezer.

DYING:
In this stage it is wise to call home before boarding the bus and telling them that u MIGHT only come home and let me tell u there in NO point waiting for the next bus to come because the next bus will be equally if not more crowded. When the bus approaches the stop u might wonder “how the hell am I gonna get into this sea of humanity”. Don’t worry. U just have to stand near the entrance and a wave of humanity will push u inside. It is advisable not to carry any bags because when u get down after this stage either u will not have a bag or not have the straps on ur bag or the contents of ur bag will be missing. In this stage u must try to get to the entrance almost as soon as u board because only then u will be able to reach the entrance in time for ur stop. All those people who argue that they will stand near the entrance itself, it is obvious u have never seen the insides of a bus in the “dying” stage. As soon as u enter the bus the conductor will shoo u and u will be pushed by fat grandmas, stinking men and malicious aunties into the absolute interiors of the bus. A deodorant wont help in this stage because u wont have enough space to take it out and spray it on ur fellow passengers. In this stage mostly there wont be place for u to keep both ur feet on the ground. So u must necessarily keep it on someone’s feet. And don’t even dare to try to get ur ticket on ur own. If u value ur life and limbs pass the money for the ticket. This stage can get really really worst during peak summers when everyone is sweating and the stench is unbearable. And after u get down at ur stop it will take u atleast 5 minutes to collect urself and even after that all u can manage is a hobble back home.

DEAD:
What can I say. This is the worst stage by far. Personally I have never been inside a bus during this stage so I am not qualified to write much about it. When this bus arrives at the stop it is at an angle of 75 degrees to the road (instead of the usual 90). The other two wheels of the bus are almost off the ground and the number of ppl inside the bus in the sitting stage will be equal to the number of ppl hanging on the foot board in the dead stage. I never board a bus in this stage. I value my life. I cant imagine how the people are able to survive

And with the ever increasing population (and with Mr. Murphy always being on my side) i never seem to find a place to sit or stand comfortably nowadays. Phew!! i love chennai but sathyama bus travel mattum thangala pa!!

Aaaachooooo!!!

I have been suffering from this insufferable cold for the past three days and it is absolutely getting on my nerves. GOD!! Give me malaria, give me typhoid, give me jaundice. They atleast have a cure. But please don’t give me cold where medicines don’t help, the inedible unpalatable mess food does not help and the fact that I have my semester exams coming in a week most certainly does not help. I m sick of blowing my nose(the dustbin in my room is overflowing with pink colored used tissues), sick of coughing and sneezing, sick of this blasted weather which aggravates my cold by making me sweat, sick of not being able to smell anything, sick of not being able to drink or eat anything cold for this weather, sick of eating horse hide chapattis and a brown colored liquid with alien particles floating (proudly called by the mess workers as kurma) and sick of having to study a subject called software testing(which is almost as insufferable as this cold if not more!!) when all I want to do is curl up and sleep. I proudly got the photocopies for my subjects next week about two days back and at once I got this cold which makes it impossible for me to appreciate what William perry has to say about software testing (he is the jobless dude who writes book which we must read to become “engineers”). I keep telling myself that software testing might be a very interesting and absorbing subject but I am not able to appreciate its nuances because of this cold. :P:P. well whatever!! I better start studying if I must clear my papers and become another useless engineer of this vast country.

P.S: Ahem!!I read somewhere that a shot of brandy helps cure cold. Can some good Samaritan provide me with some???

Bored!!!

The writing bug seems to have bitten me. I seem to be caught in a blogging frenzy. Words just pour out once I open MS-Word. This verbal diarrhea can be attributed to the fact that nowadays I have so much of time on my hands I don’t know what to do. Suddenly the ladies hostel is blessed with 24 hrs free super fast net (originally we used to have something like 15 mins of net a day. Its an irony actually. The times when we actually needed the net for “educational” purposes like project or assignments it never existed and now when we have no use for it, it is lightning fast). So what do I do when I get absolutely sick of orkut, sending mails to equally vetti ppl, chatting with some more vetti people and reading the novels which I have already read a zillion times?? Yes!! I blog. There is no subject or anything for this blog because this blog is just a proof of my utter boredom. I am qualified enough to write a book called “100 ways to kill boredom without spending a penny”. I have suggested some ways here. These are excerpts from my book. So be grateful that I am giving u some tips for free. I am sure my book will be a bestseller once it hits the market. :P

1. do a general survey and find out who has what movies in the girls and boys hostel.

2. ask them to share it and save them on to ur computer/laptop and watch when bored (I have watched forrest gump 5 times, green mile 3 times, first daughter 3 times and a walk to remember about 6 times.)

3. when feeling really low or lonely keep a copy of veerasamy, sudhesi, dharmapuri or Michael madana kamarajan and watch them again and again.

4. give missed calls to everyone in ur phone book. Atleast 50% of the people will call you and ask you whats wrong. WARNING: Never call a parent. They will ask you to study for CAT, or study for the upcoming exams or generally and waste ur precious time giving u advice which can be used effectively to do the other things on the list.

5. change ur profile in orkut, change ur profile name, change ur display picture, change ur interests and hobbies, change ur nationality, ur religion and scrap all the people who are online in ur friends list and be assured of atleast three replies.

6. catch up on all the lost sleep(even if u haven’t lost any sleep there is no harm in catching up on the sleep that u might lose in future). Go to bed at 2 or 3 after watching all the movies and wake up for lunch the next day. Start the movie and orkut marathon.

7. if u ever get tired of doing the above have a stock of Jeffery archers, sheldon’s, Wodehouse, ken follet, archie comics, malory towers, St clares etc. these books can be read again and again and it has been proved that boredom can be killed effectively.

8. make a list of all ur favorite songs(hindi,English and tamil) and google for the lyrics and try to master the song (ur voice is of no consequence. Even if u have a voice similar to rani mukherji's sing out really loud. This will result in people coming to ur room and asking you to shut up. Once they come do not let them go. Catch hold of them and irritate them by singing even louder)

9. if u are still bored then go online and read blogs. This has been proved to be a really good pastime and can do wonders to kill ur boredom

10. still bored??? Start a blog and write about inconsequential things which are of no use to anyone but help u kill time like me.


If all this still does not kill ur boredom then you are beyond help. You have reached a stage where you must spend money to kill boredom. So catch a friend, catch a bus and go to mayajaal, blow up 150 bucks on a ticket, another 60 bucks on a burger and voila!! U have killed five hours of boredom.
For any more details please feel free to contact me on orkut or yahoo or gmail or hotmail and be assured of a quick reply!! :):)

Yipeee!!Project over :):)

Finally at long last after three months of breaking our heads, worrying and truckloads and truckloads of tension finally I have finished the final review of my project and after the review I wonder why I took such pains. Seriously the external was as interested in our project as Mother Teresa would be in reading Playboy. We were the batch before tea break and He looked at his watch twice, looked at our five minute presentation for about thirty seconds and asked us to show him the demo in two minutes and all the while he listened to all this with an extremely expressionless face. I swear I have seen more expression on John Abraham’s face (who though he looks good cant act to save his life). No wait it is a crime to even take the name of this external in the same breath as john. Atleast u can look at john even if u cant stand his acting but this external looked like he was a cross between a gorilla and Rabri Devi and had been dropped on his head when he was young(his questions confirmed this fact).

All the time when we were explaining our project we kept screaming “encryption encryption” till our lungs were hoarse and at the end of it he looks at the three of us (stupid us!!we were scared that he might actually ask us something which we would not be able to answer) and says “all is ok. But how u securing ur system. U doing encryption?”. Even now I wonder how I controlled myself and how I restrained myself from showing him my middle finger. I am so proud of myself. With clenched teeth I told him, “Sir. We are doing encryption using 1024 bit key RSA”. Oh ok he said (as if it made any difference to him).

Actually it is my fault. After four years of studying in an engineering college in Chennai I cant believe I expected the external to know something and ask intelligent questions. I cant believe that I expected some guy who would appreciate the fact that we hadn’t “bought” the project at some consultancy but had sat and worked ourselves out for the project. All these years when I have felt that my college professors are dumb god sends some external from a college as if to tell me “u think ur college professor has no brains?? You just have to check out this guy”.

Whatever I feel ashamed to say that I was scared before in entered the lab to give my final review. I was pacing corridors, kneading my hands, sweating like a pig and yawning (something I do when I am tensed :P:P) and all for someone who was only interested in getting rid of us and going for tea. Cha so much for three months of sleepless nights, doing bloody documentation and useless worry. Whatever!! It is over and I am almost an engineer!! Almost( and a completely useless one at that).

Am I silly or are there other people out there like me. The other day I was walking on the road when a malli poo (the night queen or raat ki rani) fell on me and it brought back memories of the lazy summers spent at my grandmothers place when the pookari used to come home and give it. Certain smells bring back hordes of memories for me. I dunno if this happens with everyone or not. A week back the smell of a lux soap brought back memories of second and third std when I spent of most of the time at my aunt’s place where they used the same lux soap.
There are many such incidents like this.

1.The smell of diwali firecrackers brings back the memories of second standard when I lit fire to my neighbours son’s hair(before u guys start giving me the looks let me tell u that it was completely unintentional.) and my mother put it out.

2.The smell of mysore sandal soap and filter coffee brings back the summers of sixth and seventh when we used to go to madras for summer hols and after a two day long(and smelly) journey in the train we took bath using mysore sandal soap and freshly brewed coffee(made by paati dearest) used to await us.

3.The smell of mavdu thanni brings back all the summer holidays when we used to come back after playing for a full day in the hot sun completely sweaty and dirty and after having a bath paati used to give us thayir sadam in our hands with a little bit of the mavadu thanni on top. It was the closest I went to experiencing heaven.

4.The smell of the rain(mann vasanai/mitti ki khushboo) brings back the memories of the days spent cuddled in a sofa reading an amazing book sipping tea and having some heavenly bhajjis made by amma.

5.The smell of Vaseline reminds me of those cold winters spent in Jamnagar when my skin used to be like the sahara desert(It used to be so dry. This is a joke. This is where u r supposed to go ha ha ha ha.)

6.The smell of garnier face wash brings back memories of first sem when I sincerely used it and later stopped because I started spending my own money on these things after first sem (when mom bought all my provisions). Shifted to the much cheaper hamam then .LOL.

7.The smell of surf excel brings back memories of third year when I used that to wash clothes in hostel.

8.The smell of vicks brings back memories of second sem when I suffered from severe sinus problems and that particular vicks dabba was like my life breath.

9.The smell of Fa deo takes me back to the fifth sem when I used that till I started itching in various places.

10.The smell of fevicol brings memories of final year where we destroyed a zillion rubber trees while doing the decoration work for our technical and cultural events.

I could just keep going on. These might not mean anything to u guys but each of these smells evoke hordes and hordes of memories of summer, winter, monsoons, college days and lovely school days. And before you declare that I am a sentimental fool me let me tell u that nothing can be further from the truth. I have no sentimental value for things people or places. I love change. I don’t keep the dress which I wore when I wrote my first english unit test in college and since I scored good marks in that I have been wearing that ever since for all my exams. I swear some of my friends have such sentiments. One of them does not take a bath before she leaves for an exam because it is lucky for her. LOL. No I m not such a person but what I have written above is something I just cannot control. If I smell something it just brings back all the good bad bitter sweet memories. Like I have already mentioned I dunno if this is normal or not. There was even a time when the smell of a public urinal bought back memories of the time I went to manali on a camp and was forced to use a loo used by fifty other people. Sheesh!!! Am I crazy or what??

Teeth Troubles

Last week sometime I visited the dentist to fill a couple of cavities. For people who know me don’t u dare give me that “sigh!! Not again” look. But yeah I have visited the dentist so many times that I can look at Ogden Nash, smirk and say “ho ho..u silly sissy goose.u r scared of sitting in a dentist’s chair??”(for people who are like “duh!!Ogden who??" Go to google and type "Ogeden Nash This is going to hurt just a little bit. it should thorow up some meaningful links.i am too lazy to add a link here"). In fact the dentist is like a family friend. He comes for our family weddings, he knows where I study, how much I scored in my 12th boards and many such personal details.

It started in class 11th when my neighbour’s five yr old child took one look at my ‘smiling’ face and ran away screaming “poochandi varadhu poochandi varadhu” and then my mom took one look at me and said “ahem!!maybe its time we took you to a dentist..”

Now I have absolutely no illusions about my looks. I am the person whom mothers tell their young kids about when they don’t eat or drink milk “paal kudikalena onoda pallum andha akka madri aaidum”. I would smile benevolently at the child and it would gulp down the milk(whether it was out of fear of me or fear of the mother I still don’t know). I am about as related to beauty as Pamela Anderson is to TR.

But still I was taken to the dentist who reeled back after looking at me and asked my mother “when did the accident happen” for which my mother told him that I was born this way. And so it was decided that I would get braces. I screamed I shouted I fretted I fumed but to no avail. I tried telling them that whatever they did it wouldn’t make a difference because god had me that way and I had no complaints. But I was dragged and pushed on to the dentists chair and for the next four years, yes u heard and read right FOUR years I have undergone the torture. I removed my braces in my second year of college and till then every second Sunday of every month I would be sent to the dentists office where I would be made to lie in an extremely undignified manner and the dentist would put things like a hacksaw blade, a drill, jets of water, cement (no no..i am not talking about building a house. These were some of the instruments the dentist put in my mouth) and many other things whose name I do not know.

Well the fact that the dentist was good looking smart and funny did help reduce the pain to some extent(I was given 9 anesthesia injection to make my mouth numb while the doctor pulled four of my permanent teeth). I mean seriously when a guy like Tom Cruise is peering into your mouth and pulling ur teeth while giving u a drop dead gorgeous smile the pain seems to disappear away and I just stared at him open mouthed (both literally and figuratively)

Anyway after four years when I finally removed the mass of metal from my mouth I sought my neighbours now nine year old cheeky son took him to a room and gave him a dazzling smile. The last I heard he was undergoing treatment for shock.

So basically the braces did not make any difference and nothing good came out of four years of braces and in fact in those four years I suffered severe tooth decay (try brushing ur teeth with a huge mass of metal in ur mouth. Brushing was an extremely difficult and painful task and not something I looked forward to) and had to visit the dentist even more regularly to get those filled. And then after I removed my braces i filled a couple of teeth and then last week I filled two more. So Right now I have more fillings in my mouth than the amount of hair on TR’s and Anil Kapoor’s body put together, more fillings than the amount of fat on gabten’s body than the number of bags in my sister’s wardrobe than the number of viruses in my laptop than the number of…… I cant think of anything more. But I am sure you guys have a fair idea of how big a number I am talking about. I was just fantasizing that if after a million years some archaeologist excavates some part of earth and finds some parts of my body, say my teeth (this is assuming that a giant earthquake will occur and all of us will be buried under layers and layers of earth and our bodies will be completely decomposed by bacteria and nothing will be left except our teeth and bones (yeah I am a very optimistic person)) then he would hold up my teeth on national geographic and say,

“As u can see we are looking at the teeth of a mammal. These ” he would say holding up my amalgam filled teeth(yeah teeth fillings are made of amalgam(nanglum konjam 12th std chemistry ellam padichirukkom)) “seem like the teeth of a female orangutan. As you can see these teeth are much bigger than human teeth. We think that a million years ago orangutans and gorillas had teeth made of amalgam unlike human beings whose teeth were made of calcium carbonate. But we have come to this conclusion after studying this one case of a female orangutan and further research is under way”

Wow!! I will be famous then. Who cares if I was mistaken for a female orangutan. Atleast I(or a part of me) will be on TV a million years from now..
But jokes apart I have so much amalgam in my mouth that even before I die of an earthquake I think I will die of mercury poisoning (amalgam is an alloy of mercury).Usually people take up medical insurance for accidents, heart disease cancer etc but at my house my father has taken medical insurance for dental care (my sister has had braces, my mom has had root canal surgery and I have been born and brought up in the dentists office).

Anyway the bootom line is that I have had enough. From tomorrow I m gonna take good care of my teeth. I am going to brush twice a day (ok. At least once a day when paste is available in hostel :P:P) and stop eating chocolates and ice creams because the dentist is getting married next month and shifting to another place.. :( :(

Have u ever been the source of a rumor and then have that rumor come back to you after an hour or two completely blown out of proportion. Believe me it is one of the funniest and most stress busting of all activities. So if u feel stressed out just catch a maami in ur flat or apartment and tell her some gilma matter and then sit back and wait for the same thing to come back to you.
This is what happened to me. A few days back suddenly the electricity went out late in the evening at my grandmother’s place (which by god’s grace is generously endowed with maami’s of all sizes and shapes). I was feeling extremely bored and I was just sitting in the balcony doing nothing when suddenly one of the maami’s strikes a conversation with me. (once these maami’s start talking it is very difficult to get them to shut up. I just took advantage of the situation). This was the conversation which took place between a maami and me.

M : yenna pa ippidi valaku etharu nerathala current poiduthu. Eppidi samaikaradhu??

Moi : aama maami. Kashtam dhaan.

M: yedhunaala current poirruku??

(I mentally rub my hands gleefully and spark off the rumor with an innocent look on my face)

Moi: yengyavadhu transformer veduchirukum maami..

M: (assimiliating this new piece of info with great joy): oh apdiya..

For the next fifteen minutes maami makes small talk asking me for the nth time about my final year project, about the company where I have got a job and why I m not studying further and if I m not studying further why I m not getting married and if I m not doing any of these then why I m wasting time at the grandmother’s place rather than living with my parents (at this time I decide to start off another rumor saying that my parents have taken sanyas and gone to the Himalayas but I decide against it thinking of the dire consequences I will have to face once I go home). After all this maami wanders off to talk to yet another maami and I sit back and enjoy the drama

This is the conversation between maami 1 and maami 2

M2 : yen di ambujam current yen poirruku ippidi valaku yethara nerathala??

M1 : theriyala di anguchi. Adyar area oda Transformer vedichirukkum nenaikaren.

M2: Oh!! Apdiya..seri seri seri

This is the conversation between maami 2 and maami 3

M3: adiye anguchi current yen poirruku ippidi sayangala velai la??

M2: theriyala di rangam. Adyar area oda Transponder (God bless NASA and ISRO. I hope this never happens ;)) vedichirukkame!!

M3: Oh!! Adhu dhaan vishayama?? Seri seri

This is the conversation between maami 3 and maami 4

M4: yenna di rangam current ippidi poiduthu

M3: Adyar area oda transponder bayangrama vedichuduthaame!! Yaaruko adi patudho theriyala..

M4: ayyayo…seri di

This is the conversation between maami 4 and maami 5

M5: adiye vanaja yenna di velichaame ila??

M4: unnaku theriyadha?? Adyar area oda transponder vedichu 4 perukku bayangra adiyama!! Malar hospital dhaan kuttinda poirpaanga nu nenaikaren.

M5: ada kadavule.

This is the conversation between maami 5 and maami 6

M6: adiye jalaja kelu di.. yenna achu?? Current kaanum. Neeyum ippidi paraparaapa irruka??

M5: ayyo unnakum theriyadha?? Adyar area transponder vedichu 4 perukku baynagram adi pattu ippo malra hospital kuttindu poirkanga..yeppo current varum nu theriyala

M6: ayyayo

This is the conversation between maami 6 and maami 7

M7: adiye savithri yenna orey irrutu. Current ila ya??

M6: aaman di. Adyar area transponder vedichu 4 perukku baynagram adi pattu ippo malar hospital kuttindu poirkanga. Inniku full day current varadhame.. yenna pandradhu nu theriyala.

At this point I can no longer control myself and I approack maami7 and ask her what the commotion is all about. She tells me.

M7: ila di. Adyar area oda transponder vedichu konja perukku bayangrama adi pattu ippo dhaan malar hospital ku kuttindu poirukka. Innum 4 days ku current varadham!! Na velacherry lu yen ponnu aathuku poren. 4 days ellam current ila ma irruku mudiyadhu.

After the maami goes I am rolling on the floor laughing like I have lost it. Had some great fun that day. I started off the rumor with a "maybe a transformer has broken down" and it comes back to me as "a transponder in the adyar area has broken down.some people have been badly hurt and have been taken to malar hospital and there will be no electricity for another four days" :D:D..Man!! These maamis are just priceless. You can count on them to provide 24 hr free entertainment...

Have u ever had one of those days when you want to go to the top of the LIC building and scream aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
aaaaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
ggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhh
hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!
I have had one of those days and that is exactly what I want to do. I have been doing the blasted documentation for my project from 9 in the morning to 10 in the night and I m sick of swearing at MS-Word, sick of showing my middle finger at the computer screen and sick of formatting, justification, bullets, page numbers, Times New Roman, bold, italics, underline and all that crap. Right now I just want to go curl up in my bed and go to sleep not caring a damn about my project or the documentation!!! :(:(
Phew!! I feel much better now after having vented out my frustration and after denting the keys ‘a’, ‘r’, ‘g’, ’h’ on my keyboard. In fact I think I see smoke coming out of ‘a’ or is it just me fuming??? Whatever!!! I m tooooo distraught to type any further. G’nite folks.

I can’t believe the time has come. The hostel farewell is over, the college farewell is two days away, and my final review is over (phew! finally.thank god) and people are already talking about study hols and their plans after exams. I have filled a zillion slam books till now. each of these incidents in some small ways are reminding me that my time is up. my college days have come to an end. soon I must face a world where I must behave in a responsible manner I must fend for myself where I cannot sleep till 12.00 in the afternoon and sleep at 3.00 in the night. Never thought I would be this senti about leaving college.

When I was in tenth I just couldn’t wait to go to high school go to a new place (Jamnagar to Chennai) make new friends. I was apprehensive but excited. when I was in high school I couldn’t wait to get to college, go to hostel meet people from different places and have a taste of freedom. at all these times I was completely ready for the next step. but now as I stand as a final year student who in a few months must go to work handle deadlines, work pressure (or whatever it is that working people have to face. I have no idea.) I suddenly realize that I don’t want to do all this. I want to stay as a college student forever and ever. It is also the thought of the future that scares the shit outta me.

It’s funny how everyone in my house seems to know what I must do after I graduate except me. mom says "since CTS is going to call u only in November u should probably do something else before that maybe join a language course or work somewhere else". other well wishers say "no no must consider the six month break given by cognizant as a boon and prepare for CAT and other entrance exams". my sister says "just while away six months of ur time before u join CTS. eat well sleep well and take care of urself.you will never get these days again with ur parents". after everyone has finished advising I m absolutely clueless about what to do. my sister's suggestion attracted me the most but that would mean staying in Jamnagar. I would more easily go to a concentration camp than go to that retirement home a.k.a Jamnagar.

It’s an absolutely dead city with nothing to do. I call it a retirement home because that’s what it is. u can go for long walks in the morning, u can listen to bhajans in the evening in the temple, u can gossip with neighbors about their sons and daughters and husbands and their promotion, u can join yoga and reiki classes to find inner peace(yada yada!!bull shit). but if u want to watch a movie u must travel 35 kms to reach the nearest theatre. if u want to go shopping u must plan an expedition(the kon tiki expedition would have been easier). because shopping means traveling another 40 kms into the main city of Jamnagar on roads which have twenty five take diversions boards on a 10m km stretch and which has craters not unlike the ones seen on the moon. if u don’t get backache,spondalitis, trachoma(yeah Jamnagar is a desert and traveling on that road with dust flying at the rate of zillion particles per second u r bound
to get dust allergy or trachoma,I know the term because I suffered from it during my stay in Jamnagar:() etc then u must either be super man, or mukesh ambani(yeah!!the dude comes by helicopter from Jamnagar)..I can’t stay there for a fortnight without losing my sanity and six months at this age is an indefinite period of time. so it must be Chennai after about a months stay in Jamnagar(can’t help it if ur parents stay there).

But what do I do after coming to chennai.i don’t want to work, I don’t to join language classes, I don’t know if I want to do an MBA right away and if I don’t do any of the above I will be shipped to Jamnagar..:( I am so confused now that I don’t want to leave college’s don’t want to leave this bliss these times of fun, no tensions, etc.

I flicked the following poem from somewhere and it describes perfectly what I feel now..


So many battles won on this soil
So many defeats embraced
So many desires fulfilled here
So many painful heartbreaks

So many friends I won here
I won a few foes too
So may blessings I did earn
Hope the curses were but few

From a teenager I became a man
Nowhere else but here
Saw life’s pleasures, felt its pains
Suffered losses and enjoyed gains

Now its time to say good-bye
To this place to its bliss
Tears of love roll down each cheek
As I plant the farewell kiss

Adieu sweet times, Adieu sweet place

Adieu…………SSN

I m going to miss my life here, I am going to miss all my friends, I am going to miss the hostel dog(ganguly), I am going to miss mess food(yeah!!i think I have totally lost it),I am going to miss all those midnight birthday parties, miss the culturals,the symposium, and miss those night outs before the exams, those endless cups of tea, all those chat/gossip sessions which lasted through the night, miss teasing the professors.....
I could just keep going on...but I will just stop here. I am going o miss you SSN!!:(:(

I have been really silent for quite some time. mainly because of project(ewww!!) and culturals(wow!!). i also took some time off to read "The kite runner" by Khaled Hosseini..guys!! please go and read the book the first chance u get, beg borrow steal the book but please read it. WOW!! what a book. on the cover there is a revirew for the book which says "after i read this book for a long time everything else i read seemed bland"..how true...my favorite book doctors by erich segal seems pale in comparison now..
thats all for now..
ciao
P.S: please read the book!!:):)

MEGA SERIAL- PART-II :):)

I have been wanting to write mega serials part II for quite a long time but I was waiting for an auspicious time. In short I was waiting for pari (ignorant ppl read THIS) to die so I could write part II.. but the 40th and last day has been stretching for the past three weeks and I just don’t have any patience. The way she is going, it looks like she might even outlive me. So rather than waiting I have decided to go ahead with part II.

Like i already mentioned in part I this pari’s relatives believe in this baba guy (though I feel ashamed to admit it I have been watching these serials with my sis. But I can justify myself saying that I was doing ground work for part II :):)) who tells them that pari is destined to die on the 10th 20th 30th and 40th day after her marriage by water fire land and air respectively. Each of these elements would have nothing better to do for the next 40 days except for plotting against pari. Actually if I had been in their place even I would have used all my powers to put an end to her on the first day itself.

Anyway so her husband (the bastard who is now changing for the good by the way) is also plotting against her. But as 40 days pass he realizes what a sweet, nice and extremely aacharamana (gag gag!!puke puke) girl she is. So now he is falling in love with her. I can even take the falling in love part. The part which absolutely had me bugged was that each time they feel “love ” for each other (which they feel when they do extremely stupid and mundane things like drinking coffee, walking down the stairs, going down the lift etc) there is a song in the background and both of them go into dream land with her dupatta flying on his face and he standing and enjoying the feel of the dupatta on his face (his dream) or him standing like an expressionless blob of flesh with her running around him(her dream) singing “itne hum kareeb aa gaye..dil ko tho pata bhi na chala ..naa chala..naaaaaaa chala..naa-aa-aaa-aaaaa chala and so on so forth till the director is able to successfully convert a three second coming down the lift into a twenty minute part with two breaks in between.

So as time passes bastard slowly falls in love with her and as expected falls out of love with his original girl friend(who is always dressed in jeans a t-shirt and is called ishika(obviously if she were called sita,tulsi,pari our bastard would still be in love with her)) finally on the 40th day he takes her out somewhere to spend the full day with her and tell her how much he loves and they spend the full day doing things which please her like eating kulfi from a road side kulfi shop where she very conveniently drops her kulfi and shares his kulfi thereby making both of them go into dreamland(another 20 minutes) and then drinking some disgusting chai in some road side shope.

Now this is one more thing I don’t understand. In all these kinds of serials without exception the lady in the lead always likes tacky things and dingy places and always says stuff like “platform ke kulfi ke dunkanon mein kulfi khaane ki baat hi kuch aur hai. Baskin robbins ke ice cream mein who swaad kahan jo inmein hai” and then they will take a huge bite of the kulfi and go mmmmmmmmmmmmm... Gimme a break. Whats wrong if u like the good things in life. If u prefer eating the heavenly masala dosai at hotel saravana bhavan and not parotta paya in the kaiyendhi bhavans. Whats wrong if u like eating ice creams at baskin robbins or creamy inn and do not prefer to eat road road side ice lollies where the ice could be water from the cooum in the frozen form. And the worst part is that the heroines eating in such places is found endearing by the heroes. Puhleaseeeeee!!

Anyway so after a full day of doing disgusting things like sitting beside a fountain and discussing how pari can be so saint like and playing with unwilling children they check into a hotel room and bastard (who is absolutely smitten with pari now) asks her to wait down in the reception and goes up for sometime and then comes down and they go up by lift (and reach the third floor after 20 mins while they hold hands, giggle and go into dreamland)..well before I narrate the scenes that followed kindly read the following

Corny
Definition in oxford English dictionary:
Adj.informal
Sentimental, hackneyed

Corny
New definition in my dictionary
Adi, informal
All scenes in mega serials when the man and his lady love are left together..

Seriously the scenes which followed could have gone down in the history as few of the corniest scenes ever. Anyway as soon as pari opens the lift door she finds a huge heart made of flowers (not unlike the ones seen in wedding which proclaim X weds Y) and in the centre is written “I Love u pari” and the hotel corridor is strewn with rose flowers (pulled mercilessly out of some poor beautiful looking rose no doubt) and pari puts on a pained expression (the kind I have seen people with severe constipation portray). Its only after a while that I realize that its not a pained expression but is a look of romance. Sigh!!

And after she enters the room there is a huge heart of flowers on the bed on which is written I love u pari again (really creative guy I must say. Man!! Can’t he think of anything else other than “I love u pari” to say to the woman he loves???) and then on the side table is a yummy chocolate cake with the icing (u guessed it right!!) “I love u pari”!!!!

Pari is beyond help now and must use the loo(that’s pretty much the look on her face) and she decides she must use the lift go down and buy bastard some gift and surprise him (and give him constipation in return). She goes to use the lift (which has a sign in big bold letters which says “lift not working”. But I guess she is so used to seeing “I love u pari” that she probably thinks that the writing next to the lift is also “I love you pari” or maybe she is illiterate. Whatever!!) and this time the director decides to be creative and rather than using the lift scene for dreamy songs pari meets with an accident (finally!!there is a god after all!!) and then the next twenty mins are devoted to the accident and bastard running down the stairs like a madman to rescue his lady love. Finally he meets her on the ground floor with a gash on her head which is bleeding which is the only damage and for which she is admitted to a hospital kept in an ICU and the doctors (a few creeps paid to walk up and down and look busy) shake their heads and try to appear intelligent and say “very serious case. Bacchna mushkil hai. She is in coma”..

I have seen the serial only uptil now and though I would love to write part III I really don’t think I have the patience to watch that shit again for another two weeks. And oh by the way what I have written in this blog are about 13-14 episodes.
So with a heavy heart I must say that this is the concluding part of this series unless someone is willing to watch it and give me inputs ;).. any volunteers???:D:D

PATHETIC PROFS!!!

Sometime last week i got my results and have been wanting to blog about it for sometime but due to lack of proper net connection have been unable to write. The first feeling that coursed through my mind when I saw the results was ultimate relief. "Shit man I cleared all my papers. I m gonna keep that job in CTS after all." was the thought that crossed my mind. Because I did not have access to the internet I learnt about my marks only the next day. I m basically writing this blog in a state of extreme hatred and anger towards my professors. When I actually saw my marks I was aghast when I saw the internal marks column of my marksheet. Three of the professors had given me 15 on 20 which is extremely poor internals

Now I wonder how the brains (if they have any that is) of these professors work. I am somehow convinced that their brains must be filled with cowdung. But hey wait a minute. Even cowdung is supposed to have medicinal properties so I guess their “brains” don’t even have cowdung. All they have is loads of spite, a very distorted sense of respect and the amazing and unwanted ability to harbor ill feelings.

I guess the professors must be using the following scheme for marking

1. If student is creative, can think on his/her own and asks relevant questions which make u squirm and say “I will refer and tell you ” >> -5

2. If the above student forgets to wish u when he sees u in the library(where u r pretending to read but actually cant understand a god damned word of whats written ) or canteen(where you are seen fighting with the canteen manager to let u take food for free because u r a staff) or sports block (where u r seen taking advantage of the fact that u r a staff by playing with bare feet when the rules say that must wear proper sports gear) >> -10

3. If student is extremely silent copies all the assignments from the prescribed book without a clue about what the assignment is all about and always sits on the first bench pretending to take notes(I say this not to insult the student but the professor. Which student can possibly take notes when the professor says stuff shit like “I want both the solution and the answers” , “what is this noise coming from the backside of me” , “it is like that only that the compiler compiles”..sheesh!! ) and nodding his head dumbly >> +10

4. If student is an active member in the organizing committee of either the symposium or the culturals and therefore does not attend classes frequently but still does well in the unit tests >> -20


5. If student runs behind the staff after every class asking silly and stupid doubts, asking them “important” questions for the upcoming test grinning sheepishly and wringing his/her hands. Also compliments the staff and asks for extra tests assignments >> +20

Seriously I am not at all being sarcastic. Each of the statements which I mention I have seen them happen to many students and most of the times to myself. I will be honest. No I cannot run behind staff trying to be extra polite and please them when I have ZERO respect for them but just want to get internals. I CANNOT sit on the first bench trying to appear serious when all I want to do is laugh my head off at the staff’s stupidity. I CANNOT and will not wish staff when I see them outside college hours. We are just two unrelated human beings then.

What irritates me most is that professors like these always say that they will grade u based only on ur test performance when frankly speaking they don’t care a rats ass about ur test marks. One particular professor(an extremely pathetic one) I know taught us for only a month and during this period(it was the symposium time) kept three tests, some hundred assignments and then left for God knows where and gave everyone(except a few) extremely poor internals. What the hell could he have judged about a student in just a month?? I am so pissed that I could track him down and give him such a piece of my mind that he will never forget his entire life.

Though I feel extremely pained to be leaving college in another 2 months(I m gonna really miss coll life) academically I am so glad that I am no longer gonna be associated with such half witted, moronic and anally retentive profs. I still have my project to go and I am sure all the profs are just waiting to screw me. Anyway lets see what happens!!

Some people just have the knack of getting on the others’ nerves I guess!!!

Tagged!!

I have been tagged by Srikanth with this huge tag which seems to keep going on and on and on.
Anyway here goes!!
Favorite Color:
There is no particular color that I dislike so I guess I like all colors. No Favorites

Favorite Food:
Everything edible and vegetarian

Favorite Month: June

Favorite Song
Tough one.I like so many. Favorite would be Tere Bin by Atif..
Hindi :
I love soooo many songs. All oldies - Mohammed rafi, kishore, mukesh, manna dey All Atif’s, KK”s, Shanker Mahadevan, and of course all Rehman’s songs. He is GOD.

Tamil:Again all Rehman’s songs and Ilayaraja.. Lately even yuvan shanker raja.

English:
Boyzone- U say it best when u say nothing at all. John Denver- Leaving on a jet plane, All Don Williams songs. All time favorites are Abba and Boney M. Hard rock and metal come under the category NOISE for me. :):)

Favorite Movie: This is a long List. Read if u have the patience.
fools rush in,life is beautiful, erin brokovich, forrest gump Casablanca, schindlers list, dil chahta hai, black, shawshank redemption, men of honor, Hotel Rwanda, Sweet November, all romantic comedies, Swadesh, mouna ragam and all animation movies

Favorite Sport:
Play – Badminton, TT, Scrabble(does it count??) , Watch - Cricket.

Favorite Season:
Summer, Summer, Summer

Favorite Day Of the week:
Saturday

Favorite Ice Cream Flavor:
Chocolate

Favorite Time of Day:
Night time. When there is no body around and I get loads of time to read and blog. I sleep during the day time to avoid people!! Heh heh..

8 CURRENTS
Current Mood: Ecstatic

Current Taste: Tangy

Current Clothes: Blue Tracks and Red T-shirt

Current Desktop: Windows XP

Current Toenail Color: I have never colored my nails

Current Time: 12.01 pm IST

Current Surroundings: My kid cousin Sid acting smart grandmom lecturing, lots of books a radio and a messy bed

Current Thoughts: Man!!! I hate advice.

6 FIRSTS

First Best Friend: don’t remember.

First Screen Name: revs

First Pet: My sister :D:D

First Piercing: Have pierced only ears

First Movie: Hum aapke hain koun(that was the first I saw in the theatre. I don’t remmeber the first one I saw)

6 LASTS

Last Cigarette: I don’t smoke.

Last Drink: Alcoholic: I don’t drink. Non-Alcoholic: Water

Last Car Ride: Feb 14th 2007. Went to watch movie Music and Lyrics with my SISTER(please note this point and NOT the date ;))

Last Movie Seen: Music and Lyrics

Last Phone Call: My sister asking me what I wanted for dinner.(its not like I have many options but I still tell her something to please her)

Last Book Read: Interpreter of maladies by Jhumpa Lahiri.

Have You Ever Broken the Law: Dude!! I have never followed the law

Have You Ever Been Arrested: No. I haven’t broken laws to that extent. House arrest yes but police arrest No

Have You Ever Been on TV: No

Have You Ever Lied: Many Many times. There was a time in my life when I lied so much that even I believed it was the truth.. LOL

Have You Ever Kissed Someone You Didn’t Know: No

4 THINGS

Thing You’ve Done Today: Spoken to my granmom after a long time, Didn’t meet for a project meeting after a long time, Had great food after a long time

Thing You Can Hear Right Now: Atif singing Tere Bin, My kid cousin Sid singing something. Cant make out words. My garndmom talking

Thing You Can’t Live Without: Internet, Cell phone, Friends and my family(mom dad sis and grandmom).

Thing You Do When You’re Bored: I love to read. I have the ability to read the same books and novels again and agaon. I once read an Archie comic about 30 times because I was so bored. Sometimes I message when I am bored

4 PLACES YOU’VE BEEN TODAY:
Airport(to collect my laptop[yipeeeeeeee]) from my dad’s colleague, sisters house, grandmothers place and garndmom’s kitchen

3 PEOPLE YOU CAN TELL ANYTHING TO
Sister, Milinta, Ebin

2 CHOICES

1. Black or White: White 2. Hot or Cold: Hot

1 THING YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE
Start an NGO.

I TAG:
Rahul, Milinta(new to blogger), Ashwin, Padmashree ,Sheikheeee and Ravikumar

MEGA SERIAL- PART-I

Because I have absolutely nothing to do during my final year of engineering(not that I did much during the first three yrs but I at least had college five days a week and tests and assignments over the weekend but in final yr I have just two papers and hence college only on two days of the week and hence enormous scope for doing nothing) I have been staying at my sister's place(to do “project work”. just typing the word makes me go into peals of laughter. god only knows what’s going to happen to our project. well I will reserve that for another blog).

Well for the past 20 years I have known my sister and though she is far from being sane, level headed and normal I could safely say that her views on soaps and mega serials were pretty much the same as me. So u can imagine how surprised/shocked/flabbergasted (no forget it!!U can’t imagine. I positively goggled) I would have been at 9.00 pm on Monday night when I sat down to watch KBC my sister snatched the remote from me and declared that she wanted to watch "Woh Rehne Waali aasmanon ki" or some crap like that. When I gave her one of my looks (the kind of look which said "u know. It’s not too late. I can still take you to a good doctor and u will be all right in a couple of days"). That was when I got my second shock when she said "please yaar.I have been watching it for the past five months"... (Errr.is there anyway that u can divorce a sibling??). And she put me through the torture and I had to sit and watch that serial.

Well this is how the story of this megaaaaa serial goes. (I got the whole story by just watching one episode). There is this guy whose horoscope says that the girl whom he marries will die within 40 days. He loves some woman and because he obviously doesn’t want her to die he marries this other woman (who by the way is called pari (fairy in Hindi)...I have always wondered why the protagonist in these soaps is always called by names like tulsi, paarvathi, sita, kumkum, Devi. I mean seriously get a life. There are also people who are called revathi, shruthi etc and trust me they are not all that bad ;)). well anyway so he marries this pari female who is the epitome of sincerity, peace, patience and love (obviously!!) who keeps smiling even though she knows that the bastard married her because he wanted her to die. I mean seriously how can u keep smiling diabetically when u know that 40 days later u r going to die. Well anyway so this is the story. and oh by the way these 40 days started 5 months ago (when my sis started watching it) and still a day or two of this disgusting pari's life are left (which I am
sure will stretch for a month).

well anyway so this pari is so sweet that she changes bastard and makes him fall in love with her and so my sister is watching the serial because she wants bastard and pari to fall in love and obviously because she is the main heroine she must live and hence the 40 day theory is shit and since she is loveliness personified she gets the man she wants (all this does not deter my sis from watching). well anyway I wouldn’t be so irritated if these soaps were a real realistic(am sorry did I just use realistic and soap in the same sentence?? I must wash my mouth with soap. pun unintended).

Well anyway,
how is it that when I get up in the morning I find

1. Half my hair on the pillow
2. A new pimple on my face
3. My remaining hair standing in four different directions at unnatural angles
4. Dirt on the corners of my eyes
5. Dark circles under my eyes
6. My pjs absolutely crumpled and smudged with orange juice, sambhar etc…

and how is it that when pari gets up in the morning she finds

1. Blush on her cheeks (attributed to extra rouge)
2. Her lipstick still intact
3. Her fake eyelashes and eyeliner absolutely in place without smudging
4. Her hair perfectly made without a strand outta place
5. Her silk nightie looking the way it does in showrooms
6. The standard smile on her face

And all this after bastard makes her sleep on the floor because he does not want to share a bed with her!!

puhlease!!!!!seriously sometimes I think ekkkktaaaa kkaappooorr(I dunno what the latest spelling of her name is. this is the last one I know according to numerology) thinks she is making these serials for monkeys and not human beings. actually I think monkeys must have more IQ than people who watch these serials(sis I did not mean U..really..I swear;))..

well this post is getting way too long. I will be back soon with Mega Serials- Part II where I will delve into the various illogical repetitive and unbearable scenes of WRWAK(if u r blinking then all I can say is Duh!!dumbo.that is the short form of Woh Rehne waali aasmanon ki)

Ciao for now!!