So the other day my sister called me and went
Preethi: Yaar Shruthi, Karthik India aa raha hai.
Me: ahaan!! good. Yeh karthik kaun hai?
Preethi: what?? I cant even recollect the number of times i have told you about karthik. Why are u behaving like Lord Emsworth. Next you will probably ask yeh Preethi kaun hai. sheeeesh!!
Me: Preethi. Is it a crime to not know who Karthik is. Bata na.
Preethi: Arey appa's mother's sister's son's son who stays here in Dubai very close to my place. K and I hang out with him and his family mostly
Me: ohh ahhh!
Preethi: he is coming to india
Me: mmm hmm.
Preethi: I want some stuff
Me: ohhh!! who is going to give it to him?
Preethi: Errrr. i sort of thought you would
Me: Like hell i will. What do u want, where does he stay and when does he leave? I will try and give it to him this weekend
Preethi: errr. He is leaving on Friday and he lives in Kodambakkam
Me: Friday?? thats like day after. no way man. Work is shit in office. Its been ages since i saw sunlight. I reach home at 9 everyday. there is no way i can go to Kodambakkam and give this stuff to him. Kodambakkam!! Sheeesh!! Thats soooooooo far. I dont even have a vehicle. I might as well courier it to Dubai. What do u want that is so important?
Preethi: Errr. I want some coffee powder.
Me: what??? You want me to go all the way till Kodambakkam for 1 kg of coffee powder. Hah!! NO way!!
P: Please yaar. Its been 2 months since i last tasted coffee. (Putting on a voice not unlike Lalita Pawar in all those movies where she plays the hero's mother and goes "Cough Cough Betaaaaa mujhe bahu ka moo dikha de phir mai khushi khushi yeh duniya chod ke chali jaoongi")
Me: Whatever happened to Nescafe, Bru etc
Preethi: Ewwwwww. You know how much i hate instant coffee. I want filter coffee. Proper Leo Coffee shop coffee powder put inside a filter with hot water around 100 degrees temperature poured over it and percolating to give the sexiest aroma ever. mmmm
M: there are children in Somalia who havent seen water/food for ages and you want coffee shipped to Dubai!! Sheeesh!! Talk about insensitivity!!
P: please yaar
M: Abey!! why dont you ask karthik to buy coffee powder. I am sure there is a Leo Coffee shop in Kodambakkam.
P: Chiii. accha thoda na lagta hai. Doesnt look nice. He has come to India on a flying visit and how can i ask him to buy me coffee powder, chilly powder, paruppu podu, vetthakozhambu and all that.
M: Its just coffee powder yaaar!! Eeeeeeeee!! I am not going!!
P: Please Shruthi. How many times have i taken you to the movies, played badminton with you, spoken to so many relatives, lied for you, not told amma about the time when you...
M: STOP!!! what else do u want
P: Thats more like it.!! Hmmm some idly podi...
M: Yeah ok. Will do!!
P: Aur Shruthi
P: Dont go empty handed yaar. buy something for them go. Accha thoda na lagta hai. They are doing us a favor and you go empty handed
M: Sighhh!! Ok. Shall i buy fruits?
P: Fruits?????? Eeeeeee!! Dhadhi!! Buy some mixture and some sweet from Grand Sweets or something.
So today morning i woke up at a godforsaken 5.30 to go to Kodambakkam and give Leo Coffee Powder and Idly podi to my cousin for my sister who doesnt like to drink instant coffee and only likes filter coffee if the coffee powder comes from a certain Leo Cofee Shop in Adyar, the water is set at 100 degrees centigrade and percolated for exactly 7 minutes and 20 seconds!!And oh yeah!! I did buy something from Grand Sweets. Khali haath jaana accha thode na lagta hai!!
Sisters!! BAH!!! :-\
Sisters living outside India - Double BAH!!